Dear Eve- A Marriage Devotional

Dear Eve,

As you know, you are the first example we have of what being a wife is like. Sadly, you missed the mark. I have learned from your mistake and try to remember your lesson often. You have taught me the power of being a woman, and how that power can hurt our husbands and ourselves. Though the husband is the head of the household, we all know that us women are pretty powerful. We have the ability to have our husband’s become putty in our hands. We can change their minds and have them do what we desire. What we do with our power can either strengthen our marriage or break it down.Continue Reading

5 Verses for Wives of Pornography Addicts

1155ee97b5dcbf190e811d19ff8128ffI came out a couple weeks ago and have said that my husband has a pornography addiction. I did not do that to shame him, but to offer encouragement to other women who are facing the same situation as I am. I do not feel free to share at my church the struggles I face. I have the most amazing church family, but pornography is just one of those issues. My husband is doing good still, but I know as with any addiction that the struggle will be lifelong. I also know my God is in control!

Last week I had the chance to attend the Refine Us Tour and the couple that spoke have such an amazing testimony. They have gone through many trials including pornography and infidelity. Now their mission is to help others.

When I think of my husband’s addiction I pray for him. I know his addiction is not about me. At least I know it is in my head, sometimes my heart doesn’t get the same message. That is when I need God’s Word. Here are 5 verses that have helped me understand and cope with what I am going through.  Continue Reading

Trusting God to Fix It

Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. Proverbs 19:21 

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Do you try to control things? Do you want things to go according to your plan? I have a big problem with that. I am pretty controlling and that is not a good thing. My husband deals with a very serious addiction. It affects our marriage. Ever since I found out about the problem, I have tried to fix it for him. I have begged him to get help. I have tried to get him to read books, watch movies, and go to addiction recovery groups. For almost 8 years I did this. I prayed to God that my husband would get rid of his addiction. The problem was I thought I was God’s answer. I was not trusting God, I was pridefully thinking I could make my husband stop.

So, what is this addiction my husband has? It is something that MANY churches don’t talk about. Nor do many churches have programs to help with this particular addiction. My husband is addicted to pornography. I thought I could fix it for my husband. I thought maybe if he knew he was hurting me with it, he could change. I thought my tears would stop the addiction. I thought my refusal of intimacy would stop it. I also tried the opposite, being available any time he wanted it. Nothing worked because I am not the answer. God is the answer!

God did recently start working in my husband’s life. I didn’t even start the conversation about getting help, my husband did. He now wants to get help. He joined a group and has surrendered his addiction to God. It hasn’t been easy for him. I am trying more now than ever just to shut up and let God lead. Part of me needs to see that God is powerful enough to help my husband. Some great things have started in my household that I am super excited about. My husband and I do devotions together now. He talks about and shares spiritual things with me now, and he has never done that before.  I  know his road to recovery is going to be long and hard, but now I am fully trusting in God to fix him and to fix me as well.

Do you have a hard time trusting God sometimes when you think you know the answer?

 

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