Foster Care Fears | How to Deal with Doubt

This coming Saturday I am beginning my foster care training classes. This week has been rough because all of a sudden fear crept in. I know in my heart that my calling from God is to be a Mom. Foster fare is super close to my heart since being in the system in my teen years. Today I am opening up and sharing my foster care fears.

Foster Care Fears


Foster Care Fears

Not Being a Good Mom. Some foster parents have had children of their own. They have done the parenting thing before. This is my first go round at parenting and I am getting children who need extra love and care. In my heart I know I am up for the challenge, but I have been questioning my ability this week. People have told me all my life that I am a natural with children, right now I am just not feeling it.

Not Being Strong Enough to Let Go. The goal of fostering a child is to rebuild families. I know this important because I am thankful to have repaired my relationship wth my birth father. The goal of a foster parent is to create a strong bond with the child. If the birth parents get their act together then reunification will happen. Will I be strong enough to let go and then want to start that process all over again.

Not Bonding with the Child. You are supposed to bond with every child that comes into your home. As a teacher, I can tell you each and every child in my classroom was special to me. I knew their strengths, their weaknesses, and would advocate for them all the time. What if it is different when I am in the Mom role?

How to Deal With Foster Care Fears

Think About the Reason. For me, I have to get out of my head. Foster care is NOT about me. It is not about me thinking I am a good mom. My ability to let go doesn’t determine the fate of the child. Loving the child will come naturally as God’s love filters through me.

Related Post: Things I Learned in Foster Care Orientation

Practice Self Care. Take some time to take care of you. This should happen all the time. Take a bubble bath, color in an adult coloring book, watch a fun movie. Get out of your thoughts.

Talk them Out. I put them into words here on this blog but I have also shared with a few friends and most importantly with my husband. Sometimes all you need is to get the words out and then move on.

If you are a foster parent, did you have these same fears?