I am a pretty independent person. I guess that happens when your childhood points you in a direction where you learn that you can’t trust others around you. Part of me always tries to protect myself and not give up control. Sadly, I kind of run things in my house. I don’t want it to be that way. Growing up in church I know submission is part of having a godly marriage. Submission means trusting not only in your husband, but having trust in God. That is the point of submission- giving God control of your life.
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Ephesians 5:22-24
Giving up control is hard. Yet at the same time I think the stress is lessened because I am resting in the care of my husband and God. I need to feel secure. One of the longings discussed in Pulling Back the Shades is the longing to be protected by a man. That is part of the reason women flock to Christian Grey. He protects Anastasia by controlling everything that he can. He promises her that he will look out for her best interests. My God does the same and so does my husband. I don’t need to fulfill my longing to be protected by a man by reading erotica. I can fulfill that need by reaching into the deep treasure that is my marriage. The only thing stopping me, is me.
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. I Peter 3:1-2
I need to pray for a submissive spirit. I have examined my life and realize that I control quite a bit in my married life. I pick where we park when out, where to eat, how our money is spent, where furniture is placed, and so much more. My husband has very little say in his own life. I asked him last week what he thought about that. He said that he feels less like a man because I don’t let him make choices for our family. I want my husband to grow into the man God wants him to be, but right now I feel as if I am standing in the way of that. God will give me a more submissive spirit if I ask it of him.
Will you join me in asking for a more submissive spirit towards our husbands?
Please make me slow to answer
Ready to trust you and the man you gave to me
Help me to speak my mind without controlling the situation
Continue to make my husband the man you want him to be.
Please don’t let me be in the way.
I love you Lord and trust you with my life.